The Ghost of you and me.

I didn't mean to fall in love with you
And baby there's a name for what you put me through
It isn't love, it's robbery
I'm sleeping with the ghost of you and me

The Ghost Of You and me.

Welcome

Hi welcome to my blog!
HATE IT OR LOVE IT, its still my blog

Profile

Calvin Matthew
18
Cancer
FRIENDSTER.
Some things that you ought to know bout me.
I dont give a F**K what you think bout me.
I am me,and no1 will change it.
I'm cruel in my language and i may hurt your feelings with it.
Dont get on my wrong side.
Once your there,there is no ticket returning to the other side.
Dont you even dare point a finger at me without any points.
Never judge me. I hate when people do that.
Erm,what more.ask me if you have any question..

Tagboard

Credits

Edited By Melancholyy-
DeviantART.
Coldwindz Basecode.
Is12806 Basecode.
Photoscape .
The song: Ghost of you and me.
All the changes in my blog has been done by my lil sis EQA.Thank you so so MUCH!!!

Other

I love my GOD
ALLAH
I love my Family.
MoM -a person whom i'm
thankful for giving
birth to me
Father -I'm so like you
Sister Fadilah Hanim-always kind to me
Brother Shahirin -life wont be the
same without you
Sister in law Nadwah-My box full of secrets
I love my Aunties&Uncle.
Aunty Far&Husband -You guys are the best
Mami&Husband -You guys are the best
Uncle&Wife -You guys are fun
Mak Ngah&LateHusband -I luv you guys
Paman Zali&Wife -Awsome
Uncle Dik&Wife -I miss chilling with
Cik Nah&Husband -nice to be related
I love my Cuzzins.
Ayu -I love you so much
Kak Erli -Cool to be related to you
Mira -Watsup DOK!!
Arwah AJE -Your the best Adek
sedare...miss having you
around
Kak Aidah&Husband -Fun to be with
Kak Ean&Husband -Good day mate
Abg Mamat -Cool
Arwah Zaid -I missed you so much
i wish your still here
with us. :(
Shirin -Shall we buy that???
Shamin -Stop playing with the com
when i'm around can???
Jaja -Your a GOTH&I'm an EMO.
Ina -Hey Watsup!!
Suhaila -Best Motivator
Rafiq -Best Dealer
Ita -Pleasent moments with
you in the past
Afiq -your one of a kind
I Love My Blood Brothers and Sisters.
Shikin -Love you
Iskandar -Your the Best
Sharizad -I dont have to say
what i have to say
I love my friends.
Hafiz -Lunch???
Kamini -What would i ever do
without you
Vera -Your my dumbo
Richard -Haiz Sian Lah
Yuen Chung -Buddy
Siok Huan -I miss you
Siti Sarah -12 APRIL!!!
Syahrum -Idk what to write
Shahrana -What are best friends
for???
Nadiah -Nice to talk with
Azie -Sis....i'm all ears
Hafiz -Haiz...go on and forget me
aku kan siape
Syai -Lets shake the fun out
Haikal -Busu...do what you like
Irfan -Lets SHOP!!!
Zack -Thanks for being there
My GA
If i forgot anyone else,do tell{:

Happy New YEar!!!!!

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy New Years

2009

EVERYONE

. . .

. . . . . .+. . . . . .

. . .

But too bad so sad on the first day of this hopefully Great year

my body came up with a fever of 43'C

OMG

i'm sick

and the worst part is doctor's all around are close

coz its new year

*note to body*

NEVER FALL SICK ON NEW YEAR OR ANY HOLIDAYS

Fever,dry cough/wet cough,sore throat,itchy eyes

but enough of my illness

you must be asking what did i do for countdown yesterday

well

i went to the airport to fetch my dear aunty who is coming back from pilgrimage

flight landed at 1025

she came out at 1218

OMG

the luggage took so long to come out

OMG

but its good to know that they have safely come back

so later i'm going to her house

coz she wanted a gathering as she misses us so much

(i miss her too)

and yes

IN THIS SITUATION WITH ME ILL I'M STILL GOING

see how good i am

haha

i'm giving myself too much credit

haha

ouch my body is aching

there i go again

i'm not use to falling ill

so whenever i am,i'll complain

so bear with me

tomorrow still have to go for training

SoUl PeRcUsSiOn

hopefully

by tonight this illness will get off of me

i think thats it for now

my hands are shivering terribly

i cant believe it take me 1/2 hour to write this blog

stupid hands shiver becoz of this stupid illnes bocoz i have a weak imune system

StUpId mE

NaH I dont mean what i SAID

I'M SMART

5:03 AM

Are you thinking what i'm thinking???

Monday, December 29, 2008

Hello reader's

again my apologies for not updating my blog

been busy with training and life

Talking bout life

lately I've been thinking alot

and upon viewing this 1 particular video

I came to realise something

and its about time that i should talk about this

Fate & Destiny

Two words that binds the whole meaning towards life

What are they

If we are fated to it...are we destined to do it???

or can we change our destiny and avoid whats fated???

Big question HUH

whoever unlock this mystery question must be pure braniac

its not what u can solved with your daily equations or notions

its something that u have to take time and think

look at the whole idea about it

figure out how to put things in place

and see the bigger picture to it

...

.....

.......

.....

...

If you ever know that that is the last 24hour that you have in this life

what would you do???

stay in bed and prepare yourself for the finale countdown

as for me

i will not do that

i will luv to spend my last hours with my dear ones

tough I've said that i hated every1 in my life

deeply inside

never have i regreted to meet each and everyone

through good or bad

everyone is dear to me

and i hope its vice-verse

I will spend my final hours being happy

reflecting on what has been given to me

all the good and bad memories

looking at my dear ones being happy that THIS sarcastic bastard is leaving for good

and i don't even want to see a single teardrop dripping on any ones face

i will never forgive myself if that happens

Mother

Father

Sister & Husband

Brother & Fiancee

Tok Bak

Mami Bedah & Husband

Aunty Farr & Husband

Uncle Siddik & Wife

Mak Ngah & Husband

Uncle Dik & Wife

Cik Nah & Husband

(Mak Busu & Husband)

Ayu & Erlina

Mira &Nazir

Mamat,Mr & Mrs Pearson+son

Aidah & Husband

(Daughter & sons of Mak Busu,Nisa,Hafiz)

Suhailah,Azlina & Hafizah

Rafiq,Shahita & Hafiq

Shirin & Shamin

:.:

Miss Retnam,Miss Saras,Mr Yong,Mdm Yati,Miss Siti,Miss Yoe,Miss Ho,Mrs Ess

i cant believe I'm typing this but Miss Lim(Whoa)

Mr Iszal & Mr Gana

Miss Lyna(what will ever happen to me without you)

Shikin & Rex :P

Hafiz(TGPS),Kamini,Vera,RCCR(dont be surprise your name is here),Shah,Zaii,Nazmul

Zakiah

Normista,Sarah,Syahrum,Sasha,Tessa,Nadia & Lut,

Edward Brumer,Ethan,Ah Choon, & Benny

Shikah,Shariff,Eqa,Azie,Ridhuan,Joe,Sham,and the rest of the soul members(sorry i cant name you all but too many names to remember)YOU GUYS NOE WHO YOU ALL ARE(every single member of the Soul Family)

Eustance&Ryan&Adilah,Ken,Yushi Kudo,FUN Yong,(never regret a single moment meeting you guys)

And Those Whom I hate But Still Like To See

I will never forgive myself if i go without saying sorry to you guys

AFIQ REZZA,INTAN,BRASON,YANA,HANNAH

And as for the rest of the people who knows me

well

i would still luv to see you all

You Know Who You Are

+=-=+

TadAA

That's the 'LIST' of people whom i would like to spend my last 24-hours with

Peace Out Readers

8:29 AM

TiReD

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

WAH

ive been like so so very tired lately

have no time to update my blogspot lately

everytime i lay infront of my lappy,i fall asleep

HOW TO UPDATE

sry ppl

But not to worry,i'm here now and i am updating

there is nothing much going on in school lately

same old same old

OUH OUH

BTW

Mubarako Bakrie to all the muslims in the world

I had a blast on hari raya haji

went to my grandfather's place

he cook nasi MINYAK(AYAM)

SYIOK

haha

and ive been eating lots and lots and lots

i think i might have put on a few more weight

must get them out of my body FAST!!!

Ouh.....and i have to say this

coz i promise i will write bout it

so i am gonna write now

That day after i pick up my cuzzy wazzy cuzzin who werks 2 blocks away from my house

then after i pick her up her friend wanted to meet up

so we took the bus two stops down to the MRT AMK

i know....2 stops only but lazy to walk ah

then the friend told us to get rokok gulong,a particular brand

so we walk round amk interchange area

we rush and search far

but could not find so we end up buying the brand TRIANGLE

HAHA

so all this while i have heard so much bout him

saw a pic of him

and then i finally get to meet him

at first sight when i saw him

FAZ

STUNNED

tall skinny

wears black top to bot

nice outfit

NICE HAIR

and recently from what i heard

A SK8TER BOY

its all a mordern bout him

i LUV his hair

spike up nicely

i can never do my hair like his

and his born in the year of the HORSE

same as yours truely

but his way way mordernize then me

his looks is like a wild kid who has took a wrong path in life

but guess wat

HIS IN RP(republic poly)

OMG

his way too cool

to be describe in words

you have to meet him in order to experience what i had

SO there you go

thats my update this time

i hope to update soon

BTW

SCHOOL HOLIDAYS IS COMING FOR ME!!!

10:13 PM

Erm....Wha Happens Today????

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Today i woke up late(again as usual)

got to school and found out that the class was on break

so i like call my group(SlackerZ)

yes.....we are the slackerz of the class

haha

but i got to find out Naz never come(sick)

got to find out also edward still at home

also ethan is on the way to school

edwards car broke down....so cant drive to school(HAHA)

kk...i know i'm cruel

so i was in school all alone

I'M MR.LONELY

A.K.A EmoticoFreak/WildkinZ

haha...no link

so i was in school all alone

went to the stadium to wait for the other 2 KIDZ

while waiting look at the MINAH TUDUNGS doing the flying fox(O_O)

i know....where are they from...idk

who are they....MINAH TUDUNG is all i can say

got bored after 3 mins of watching them

so i took out my scrapbook and start composing a new song

yes....its seems that i now have a habbit of writting songs

tough i am still waiting for a friend of mine to compse the background music

once its done i wanna post my songs HERE and in youtube

AMIN

haha

wat are my songs about???

ERMM

you'll just have to wait and see

most of my songs is about what has happen to me

my life experience

feeling in love

heartbreak

HOLIDAY

haha.

so yeah...thats about it for today

ouh...had my practical phase test

the first 1 was ok..i can manage to do it with no worries

second 1 was much more easier...ans is given in a pic

so juz had to copy it

but the problem is...the F**CKING teacher was nagging coz my haor was too long

WTF

i like to have a long hair

thats y i keep it long

so juz F**K off u *****

argh....

but i'm still chill

4:46 AM

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Today after school i went to see a friend of mine

she had juz lost her father on 1st of december around 7plus

i was at my aunt's place

if you had read my previous blog,you would know why i was there

when she message me at that point of time

i sat on the floor

and my heart missed a beat

i look at my sister

and my eyes started tearing up

i told my sister what i had received

she was stunned

i helped her spread the news to our friends

the first 1 was kamini

and the first thing she said was

"HUH!serious...eh dont joke eh"

is death something that i would joke about

that was what i told her

so me and kamini went to see her at her house

tough she is sad,she tried her best not to show it

she told us bout how much the death of her father was alike to her mother's

her mother pass away on the 10 of december (many years ago)

and her dad pass away 1st of december 2008

her mother pass away 1 week before hari raya aidilfitri

and her dad pass away hari raya haji

when she told me those words

i could hear her tone

full of sadness

her eyes stared down to the floor filled with tears

but she hold it back

me and kamini look at her

deep in me i wanted to cry out and let those tears of mine run down my cheecks

but like i always tell myself

i have to be strong for them

so we chatted about other stuff to drag her mind off things

and then when richard(joker) and yushi(as ever dump but funny) came

it became more joyful

tough i know that Zack(zakiah) was feeling dam low and sad

she was strong to not show anything

and when we told her that we were leaving

i told her,after kamini said it

"if you ever need anything,pls do text either myself or kamini and we will try to aid u

as much as we can"

tough its nothing much

i hope she knows that we are there for her

and again,for the 7th time this year

i learn that life is fragile and never ever think that life is forever

life on earth is only a short period of time that god had given to us

and at any point of time,he can take it back

Zack,we all luv you

8:11 AM

I tried so Hard

Monday, December 1, 2008

I juz came back from the airport

I went to sent my aunt off as she was going to the holly land

Earlier in the day

after school i went straight to my aunt's place

chatted with her daughter,my cousin

who was with her son(Ryan Harris)

She told me how sad she is gonna be

after losing her youngest brother

my cousin who moved on to the after-life after meeting withan accident

a bike accident early 2008

and now that her mum is gonna leave for 1 month

she told me that she dont know how to react to it

I told her that its gonna be only for a month and that everything will be back to normal after

But i guess actions is bigger then words

tough i have felt being left by my mum when she went to the holly land

i still had my siblings and my grandpa and my sweet aunty to take care of me

but i will never know how much it is to loose a blood

as i sat by her,i saw her eyes wondering off

looking at my aunty who was napping on the praying matt

Thats when i told yself that I had to be strong for them

so that i could lend my shoulders to them to shed their tears

At the airport

we took pictures together with my aunty and uncle who was going off

tough at first part it seems to be some what like a cheerful event

the tears starts to fall as soon as they bid their farewells

as i hug my aunty

my eyes started to filled with tears

but for the sake of her son and daughter

my beloved cousins

i keep on telling myself that i had to be strong for them

so i pulled myself away and look around to fade the tears away from my eyes

as my aunty and my uncle went thru the first gate

all of us tried to wave goodbye,but only the tall ones were able to see

fortunatey i was tall enough to see then walk off and disappear

i turn to look at my cousin

not to my surprise

both were crying

the most touching part was

Ryan Harris

the 1 year old kid's eyes started to turn redish and was filled with tears

as tough he knows that his grandma and grandpa was goona leave

after we got away from the crowd

i walk to my cousin and rub her back

Still trying to be strong and not shedding any tears

i told her

"Everything will be just fine"

tough the words meant nothing much

it was short and simple

and she knew what i was trying to say and simply smile back and me

and said

"I'll be just fine"

on our way back in the bus

when the driver dimmed down the light

it was a nice apportunity for me to take a quick nap

i lay back comfartably

and switch on my ipod

and guess what

the song which suits the situation burst out

"I hate this part-Pussycat Dolls"

i knew it was safe for me then as no one would be able to see me cry

so i let it all out quietly

I tried so hard to be strong for them

but i guess i can never be that strong afterall

and now i am still thinking of what to text them tomorrow

to tell them that they have me if ever find themselves lonely

10:49 AM

The Ghost of you and me.

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Happy New YEar!!!!!

Are you thinking what i'm thinking???

TiReD

Erm....Wha Happens Today????

I tried so Hard